Today was a really tough day. I couldn't believe how much we had to get done and in the short time to get it done. I felt like I was going to be permanently attached to the computer for a while there. I ended up working late this evening, finally getting home around 6:20 p.m.
I checked in on Walter when I got home and we decided to head out to get something to eat this evening at Mi Hicienda's. The food was great as always, but the service was a bit slow this evening.
I'm heading back into work at 8:30 in the morning, so I'm going to get to bed a bit early this evening.
Email & Newsletter Gleanings:
Thought For the Day: “In selecting men for office, let principle be your guide. Regard not the particular sect or denomination of the candidate - look to his character.” — Noah Webster
My mother's friend joined Weight Watchers, and the other day when she was getting ready to go to the weekly meeting her little grandson asked her where she was going. She said she was going to her fat club.
When she got back home her grandson said, "Well Grandma, are you fat yet?"
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
I checked in on Walter when I got home and we decided to head out to get something to eat this evening at Mi Hicienda's. The food was great as always, but the service was a bit slow this evening.
I'm heading back into work at 8:30 in the morning, so I'm going to get to bed a bit early this evening.
Email & Newsletter Gleanings:
Thought For the Day: “In selecting men for office, let principle be your guide. Regard not the particular sect or denomination of the candidate - look to his character.” — Noah Webster
Eyes of Love
My mother's friend joined Weight Watchers, and the other day when she was getting ready to go to the weekly meeting her little grandson asked her where she was going. She said she was going to her fat club.
When she got back home her grandson said, "Well Grandma, are you fat yet?"
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
_____________________________
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
_____________________________
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
_____________________________
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
_____________________________
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
______________________________
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
_____________________________
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
______________________________
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
_____________________________
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
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