Here it is Wednesday night and I'm doing laundry. It is an absolute pain. It is kinda of a petty thing to complain about, but at least it is just that petty. It's getting about time for me to schlep back across the street to change over the clothes to the dryer. Then it will be time to pack.
It's been busy day. I spent the day cleaning up the odds and ends that needed to be finished up or at least stablized before leaving tomorrow.
I'm heading out tomorrow for Nashville. Walter will be manning the fort with Carla for the duration. I just know they will have fun. Gettin up in the middle of the night to go 'potty'. which will require Walte to traverse a set a of stairs whether he wants to or not. I do think that he's going to try to work on walking Carla with a leash while I'm gone...should be fun to hear about when I get back.
Well the laundry's done....time to head down and pack before bed.
Email & Newsletter Gleanings:
Thought For the Day: “I would like to electrocute everyone who uses the word ‘fair’ in connection with income tax policies.”— William F. Buckley Jr
TOP TEN THINGS THE APOSTLE PAUL
WOULD HAVE DONE IF HE HAD A PC
10. Download MP3's of the Righteous Brothers for entertainment while on those long, tedious missionary journeys.
9. Visit WebMD.com about that persistent pain in flesh
8. Spiritual armor would include virus protection software
7. "To live is Christ, to die is to have a 28K modem"
6. Book boat tickets using Priceline.com
5. E-mail pictures of Peter eating pork to the gang back in Jerusalem
4. Church officers: Pastor, Elder, Deacon, System Administrator
3. Use decryption software to interpret tongues
2. Describe conversion experience as the "Divine Reboot"
1. Add Spam to list of cardinal sins
Copyright 2002 Gary Cantwell. Permission is granted to send this to others, but not for commercial purposes.
Decision
A group of junior-level executives were participating in a management training program. The seminar leader pounded home his point about the need to make decisions and take action on these decisions.
"For instance," he said, "if you had five frogs on a log and three of them decided to jump, how many frogs would you have left on the log?"
The answers from the group were unanimous: "Two."
"Wrong," replied the speaker, "there would still be five because there is a difference between deciding to jump and jumping."
Unexpected Driver
Billy Graham was returning to Charlotte after a speaking engagement and when his plane arrived there was a limousine there to transport him to his home. As he prepared to get into the limo, he stopped and spoke to the driver.
'You know', he said, 'I am 87 years old and I have never driven a limousine. Would you mind if I drove it for a while?'
The driver said, 'No problem. Have at it.'
Billy gets into the driver's seat and they head off down the highway. A short distance away sat a rookie State Trooper operating his first speed trap.
The long black limo went by him doing 70 in a 55 mph zone. The trooper pulled out and easily caught the limo and he got out of his patrol car to begin the procedure. The young trooper walked up to the driver's door and when the glass was rolled down, he was surprised to see who was driving.
He immediately excused himself and went back to his car and called his supervisor. He told the supervisor, 'I know we are supposed to enforce the law...But I also know that important people are given certain courtesies. I need to know what I should do because I have stopped a very important person.'
The supervisor asked, 'Is it the governor?'
The young trooper said, 'No, he's more important than that.'
The supervisor said, 'Oh, so it's the president.'
The young trooper said, 'No, he's even more important than that.'
The supervisor finally asked, 'Well then, who is it?'
The young trooper said, 'I think it's Jesus, because he's got Billy Graham for a chauffeur!'
Raise
Our boss told us that she is planning a salary raise. One of the guys asked, "When does it become effective?"
The boss answered, "As soon as you do."
"A smart husband buys his wife very fine china so she won't trust him to wash it."
Blind Date Slap
An 85-year-old widow went on a blind date with a 90-year-old man. When she returned to her daughter's house later that night, she seemed upset. "What happened, Mother?" the daughter asked.
"I had to slap his face three times!"
"You mean he got fresh?"
"No," she answered, "I thought he was dead."
It's been busy day. I spent the day cleaning up the odds and ends that needed to be finished up or at least stablized before leaving tomorrow.
I'm heading out tomorrow for Nashville. Walter will be manning the fort with Carla for the duration. I just know they will have fun. Gettin up in the middle of the night to go 'potty'. which will require Walte to traverse a set a of stairs whether he wants to or not. I do think that he's going to try to work on walking Carla with a leash while I'm gone...should be fun to hear about when I get back.
Well the laundry's done....time to head down and pack before bed.
Email & Newsletter Gleanings:
Thought For the Day: “I would like to electrocute everyone who uses the word ‘fair’ in connection with income tax policies.”— William F. Buckley Jr
WOULD HAVE DONE IF HE HAD A PC
10. Download MP3's of the Righteous Brothers for entertainment while on those long, tedious missionary journeys.
9. Visit WebMD.com about that persistent pain in flesh
8. Spiritual armor would include virus protection software
7. "To live is Christ, to die is to have a 28K modem"
6. Book boat tickets using Priceline.com
5. E-mail pictures of Peter eating pork to the gang back in Jerusalem
4. Church officers: Pastor, Elder, Deacon, System Administrator
3. Use decryption software to interpret tongues
2. Describe conversion experience as the "Divine Reboot"
1. Add Spam to list of cardinal sins
Copyright 2002 Gary Cantwell. Permission is granted to send this to others, but not for commercial purposes.
A group of junior-level executives were participating in a management training program. The seminar leader pounded home his point about the need to make decisions and take action on these decisions.
"For instance," he said, "if you had five frogs on a log and three of them decided to jump, how many frogs would you have left on the log?"
The answers from the group were unanimous: "Two."
"Wrong," replied the speaker, "there would still be five because there is a difference between deciding to jump and jumping."
Billy Graham was returning to Charlotte after a speaking engagement and when his plane arrived there was a limousine there to transport him to his home. As he prepared to get into the limo, he stopped and spoke to the driver.
'You know', he said, 'I am 87 years old and I have never driven a limousine. Would you mind if I drove it for a while?'
The driver said, 'No problem. Have at it.'
Billy gets into the driver's seat and they head off down the highway. A short distance away sat a rookie State Trooper operating his first speed trap.
The long black limo went by him doing 70 in a 55 mph zone. The trooper pulled out and easily caught the limo and he got out of his patrol car to begin the procedure. The young trooper walked up to the driver's door and when the glass was rolled down, he was surprised to see who was driving.
He immediately excused himself and went back to his car and called his supervisor. He told the supervisor, 'I know we are supposed to enforce the law...But I also know that important people are given certain courtesies. I need to know what I should do because I have stopped a very important person.'
The supervisor asked, 'Is it the governor?'
The young trooper said, 'No, he's more important than that.'
The supervisor said, 'Oh, so it's the president.'
The young trooper said, 'No, he's even more important than that.'
The supervisor finally asked, 'Well then, who is it?'
The young trooper said, 'I think it's Jesus, because he's got Billy Graham for a chauffeur!'
Our boss told us that she is planning a salary raise. One of the guys asked, "When does it become effective?"
The boss answered, "As soon as you do."
"A smart husband buys his wife very fine china so she won't trust him to wash it."
An 85-year-old widow went on a blind date with a 90-year-old man. When she returned to her daughter's house later that night, she seemed upset. "What happened, Mother?" the daughter asked.
"I had to slap his face three times!"
"You mean he got fresh?"
"No," she answered, "I thought he was dead."
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